RavenBlack ([info]ravenblack) wrote,
@ 2006-04-12 01:08:00
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Now that I have a place to live, I need basic furniture. Things to cook with and sleep in, most importantly. (Yes, thanks for the offer but I probably don't want to cook with and sleep in you, humorous though the suggestion would have been if I'd waited for you to make it. You know who you are. You know what you doing.)

In looking at online Argos1 catalogues for the sort of sundry things you normally take for granted, I found myself briefly tempted by the idea of combining these two atrocious products with other products of similar nature.

Bah, copyrighted images, so here are artists renditions of the products, linking to the actual products.

Cups   Bedding.

But instead I think I'll just try to hunt some crockery, cutlery and duvet-covers that aren't horrifying, instead. In other notes, it's amusing how in populating a house with furniture I seem to be trying to hermetically seal it, because all the anti-allergen products seem like much better ideas to me. Steaming vacuum, latex-cored mattress, bamboo-fiber bedding, all stainless steel kitchenware, dephasing flux-capacitance air-polarising entryguard... But really it's just that the mattress and bedding are nicer, the steamer might make the living room lose its slight dog-smell, stainless steel kitchenware is always best except for cast iron, and the imaginary entryguard keeps Jehovah's Witnesses away.

1. Since getting back to the UK it has struck me how completely unintuitive it is to wander around the shopping centres. If you didn't already know (and some of you probably don't) then what sort of a place would you say each of the following are - in each case this is all the shopfront says, and in some cases there's no window display: Natwest, JVC, HSBC, Barclays, Thomas Cook, RBS, Boots, Marks and Spencer, Frank Innes, Stuart, Argos, Woolworths, Sainsburys, Tesco, WH Smith, Orange, Clarks, Bairstow Eves, Waterstones, Westfield, Adams, Alliance and Leicester, Barratts, BHS, Birds, Dixons, Thorntons, Wilkinsons. Why can't they bloody call themselves "Bob's Supermarket", eh? There is one of this list I pass on my way into town and I still don't know what it is.



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[info]kevandotorg
2006-04-12 07:30 am UTC (link)
Mm, I completely overlooked an excellent cheap record shop in London because it just looked like a generic posh nonsense shop, from walking past it.

Abbey National have recently adopted a coffee bean as their logo. I think I see where the high street is going with this.

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[info]levez
2006-04-12 07:13 pm UTC (link)
Aye, Fopp isgreat. There's one in Cambridge too, and probabl other places besides. I got some excellently cheap, and quite recently released stuff from there.

Huh. Is that supposed to be a coffee bean? I was looking at that logo in Brum yesterday. To me, it looks like a big turd with stink lines wafting off it.

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[info]kevandotorg
2006-04-13 12:32 am UTC (link)
I don't know what it's supposed to be. Although it's apparently it's just the "flame logo" of Banco Santander Central Hispano, who acquired Abbey a couple of years ago. Perhaps it's some sort of hat.

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[info]devilmiyu
2006-04-12 08:02 am UTC (link)
But...but... I thought we've already pieced together a list and what not. Did I forget anything else? Batteries. Don't forget batteries. There's always a use for batteries, except when there's not. [grin]

(Your remote control might need one.)

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[info]dancinglights
2006-04-12 12:40 pm UTC (link)
This is what you get for moving to a continent where it would cost me more to ship you things like extra fry-pans and coffee-makers from pod and my move-consolidation than such items could possibly be worth. I will continue stocking local college students, I suppose.

As for anti-allergen things, I recommend beech-fibre bedding stuffs if you can find them. Wonderfully soft at minimal thread count and therefore not terribly expensive. I got some recently for the anti-allergen less-dusty factor and they're lovely.

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[info]conglacio
2006-04-12 12:54 pm UTC (link)
"and the imaginary entryguard keeps Jehovah's Witnesses away."

not likly. When I was one, nothing could stop me.

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[info]ravenblack
2006-04-13 06:28 pm UTC (link)
Too true - already there have been mormons. Brilliant to have talked to mormons at length in America, though, so I can turn them away not with mere "I'm not interested" but a much more fun "I have learned all about your faith already and am not interested."

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[info]ravenblack
2006-04-13 06:34 pm UTC (link)
I also couldn't actually tell whether they were mormons or jehovah's witnesses or what, so I asked. When they said mormons I told them that's good and means they're better than jehovah's witnesses.

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Jehovah's Witnesses calling at your door?
[info]exjehovah
2006-04-12 02:37 pm UTC (link)
Up close and personal Jehovah's Witnesses can be wolves in sheep's clothing.

Think about this-When the devil comes knocking on your door he may not have the 'dark goth look'.They could be smartly dressed and wielding the Christian Bible.

I have Jehovah's Witnesses family in the usa who practice the Watchtower JW enforced ritual shunning that i have not seen or heard from in 15 years.

The central CORE dogma of the Watchtower is Jesus second coming (invisibly) in 1914 and is a lie.Jehovah's Witnesses are a spin-off of the man made Millerite movement of 1840.

A destructive cult of false teachings, that frequently result in spiritual and psychological abuse, as well as needless deaths (bogus blood transfusion ban).

Yes,you can 'check out anytime you want but you can never leave',because they can and will hold your family hostage.

The world has the Internet now,and there are tens of thousands of pages up from disgruntled ex-Jehovah's Witnesses like myself who have been abused by the Watchtower cult.

Jehovah's Witnesses are often a mouth that prays a hand that kills.The Watchtower is a truly Orwellian world.
----
Danny Haszard former Jehovah's Witness X 33 years and 3rd generation www.dannyhaszard.com



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[info]levez
2006-04-12 07:19 pm UTC (link)
I would, seriously, really *really* like that bed linen, less so the dinnerware. I mean, it's fun to just look at it and count all the 'bed's. Bed BED bed Bed BED bed. Hours of happy retarded merriment.

I loathe this naming convention of today myself also besides in addition to yourself. Once upon a time it was 'Smith and Thompson Bricklaying'. Now it would be Smith & Thompson.

The name speaks for itself
It's simple, stylish, invites curiosity
It doesn't directly suggest the core business of the company, allowing for advancement and evolution of practises and target areas in a vertical model of franchise development and advancement

KICK PUNCH DIE DIE DIE FUCKER DIE KICK KICK PUNCH SLAP TWEAK DIE PINCH FUCKER DIE

There is one shop I know of which is leading the charge against this hideousness, though probably is really on the side of the enemy, really. It's called Drink Shop. Someone I know once bought a drink from there, a drink called Thirsty. It's near my parent's home, just down the road from a branch of Eat.

Assuming Eat. is indeed an eatery and not some kind of financial advisors.

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[info]ravenblack
2006-04-13 06:32 pm UTC (link)
I wandered shops looking for plates and things today, and in a moderately cheap things shop there were *two* brands of crockery with handy identifiers written all over them. And only one plain one. And they were all too expensive and rubbish for my liking, so thus far my crockery consists of three pyrex bowls.

I still have no pans or anything, so tonight I am going to have beans on toast, and actually bake the beans in a pyrex bowl. Double-baked beans.

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